domingo, 16 de dezembro de 2012

In the Army IX

She entered his office and put the trophy on his desk.
- Here you have! Your trophy!
She seemed pissed off. As she was leaving, Kane said:
- We couldn’t tell you the whole story! You wouldn’t even accept the mission! Would you?
- Mission?! You keep calling this a mission? You didn’t need a soldier for that, you just needed a woman!!
- Not just a woman, a skilled woman!
- Now you're trying to make me feel better! You don’t have to. I’m here to follow orders, sir!
- I think you underestimate yourself as a woman!
-  Really?! Well, I don’t think so! I feel great with who I am, sir!
- That’s not what I said...
- If I underestimated the woman I am, I wouldn’t be here at all, would I?!
- No! You know what you are capable of, you know you can do the same as men and you feel like a great soldier. But maybe you don’t feel you accomplish that much when you’re on a woman shoes, playing the role of a woman!
She stared at him in silence, looking for something to say. Nothing came out. He gave her some time before he continued.
- I understand you're pissed off...
- I’m just... disappointed! I thought you needed the skills and services of private Tollman!
- Well, we needed you to play a role that you did just fine. In fact, much better, more clean and efficient than we thought! We were expecting you to be a woman in there just to get in and win their trust. The rest... well, it would be private Tollman’ job. You decided how to follow from there! And I was... surprised – to say the least - finding out you were seducing someone to get to that! – he said pointing at the trophy and feeling a bit annoyed and uneasy to talk about it. - I wasn’t expecting it at all!
He was right, she thought. No one told her she would have to seduce someone!
- You’re right, it was my call! The path was there and open clear, I just took the chance...! Nevertheless, you should have told us the truth!
He was remembering those things he heard on the speakers and, feeling uncomfortable with that, he put on his hard cover of first sergeant again.
- As you said, soldier, you are here to follow orders!
She was surprised by that quick change of attitude and didn’t get what happened.
- Yes sir, I am.
- And the story you were told was for your ears only! Is that clear?
- Don't worry! The secret is safe with me!
- Good. You may leave now.
- Yes, sir.
As she was leaving, he was thinking he may had been too harsh.
- And soldier... congratulations for the good work!
She turned back, looked at him and didn’t say a word, walking out the door.
She was mad at him. Whether for not telling the truth or for not saying something concerning the whole seduction thing, she didn’t know exactly. But she was mad. She kept thinking about the look on his face when he saw her dressed as a woman, going back through his remarks for the last couple of days. She felt more than angry.

About a week later, she was out in the night, training on the gym. It was a full moon night and she left the door open to let that light in and keep the ceiling lights turned off so it wouldn't reveal her presence there. She was trying to avoid any encounter alone with the first sergeant. She had some mixed feelings about it and couldn’t get it out of her mind.

She was training on the sandbag, kicking and punching, and there were always present some intrusive thoughts. Thoughts about what once happened between them in that place. But there were some feelings coming with those thoughts… and growing. Man! She really liked that moment! What could she do about it?, she thought while leaning her head on the sandbag and resting for a moment.

At the same time someone approached the door and saw the movement of a silhouette.
- Who is there? – Said this voice that suddenly frightened her.
- Private Tollman, sir! – By the tone of voice it was a command, she thought.
- Private Tollman… what are you doing in here with the lights turned off?
It couldn’t be! She recognized first sergeant Kane’s voice.
- …It was comfortable like that… and I was just about to leave, sir! – She finally answered.
He didn’t say a word while she grabbed her things and stepped towards the door. At the moment she was reaching the door he extended his arm blocking her way out.
- Are you running from me? – He asked.
She looked at him in the dark. She wasn’t expecting that direct question.
- No, sir!
- You know… there’s this soldier I have in the recruit that is very dedicated. – He said taking his arm off her way. - Since the beginning that like this guy. I know I’m always nagging him but I must show no predilection in here and sometimes I end up doing just the opposite. Then, someday I find out he is a she and somehow the respect turns into some kind of admiration. Then… stuff happens and every time I get near her I can’t seem to think very clear. it’s kind of a dizzy feeling but it’s a darn’ good one, and I like her to be around, not just that, I want to be closer… The night you were in that party with Thorn... when I heard what was happening... That guy saying those things in your ear? ...That drove me crazy!

She was listening very quiet, remembering the moment she heard him in the auricular. Then she turned around and stepped to his other side, getting away from the door and thinking.

- I know what you mean, sir… - She finally said. - …there is this first sergeant which is always picking on me. Most of the times I don’t mind that! He’s just playing his part and I kinda like it. I like this guy and it even helps me to improve. Then he started to get closer and it’s difficult not to react to that in any way. Although there are lots of other thoughts in my mind right then, I just can’t seem to be reasonable. Although I know it could endanger both of our positions, I keep having these… questionable thoughts…

He smiled in the dark. They kept silent for some moments. Then he got closer to her, much closer, feeling her breath on his face, almost feeling her heartbeat following his own. It was inevitable! Their lips touched again and again there was a tide wave of feelings flowing from one to another.

- Man... the times I thought about that night, that kiss! The way I wanted to feel your lips again... – Kane said.
Once again they kissed each other.
- Nobody needs to know. – Kane said.
- What if… - She was saying while he put a finger on her lips, interrupting her.
- Those kind of thoughts wouldn’t have brought you where you are right now, would they? And you know what? Between us, I’m glad you are here! So, you just keep working to get where you want to! You keep up the good work!
She smiled and they kissed again.

In the following days, he felt almost tempted not to pick on her and be nicer but that would get attention so he kept doing it trying not to exaggerate. The following weeks just felt great. If it wasn´t for Thorn always nagging her, things would be perfect, she thought. It was much better than before the fight between them but he was still nagging her on an almost daily basis.

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